|W. Affe - Vietcong Pornsurfers - Gig From Hell|
|Written by W. Affe|
|Sunday, 26 May 2013 03:00|
Uber Rock interviewed Tom K., vocalist with the uber-approved Swedish outfit Vietcong Pornsurfers last week, and that followed a glowing review of their must-have new album, 'We Spread Diseases'. Now the band's bassist W. Affe resurrects our seemingly long-lost Gig From Hell feature and reminds us that Hell really is gig-shaped.....
Same thing in Germany on our way north again….
But the worst gig is easily when we played in Bollnäs (small Swedish town) a few years ago. The soundcheck went great, and there were a lot of people at the venue. We had this cool pre-recorded intro that we played in the PA while we went on stage. The intro ends and we hit the first chord in the opening song. The sound guy is not at the mixer. He is in the bar buying beer, drunk as ****.
He laughs a little at us and slowly makes his way back to the mixer. He takes his whole arm and determinately sweeps it over the console controls on the mixer, all the way to max. Then he stands back and lights a cigarette while supporting his balance against the wall.
Everything was feedbacking, vocals, guitar, snare, kick, bass, everything. You couldn't hear a single note that we played. The audience was covering their ears, before they all left. Except one guy who was too drunk to understand that it sounded like the end of the world. Even the sound guy left, or more exact, he got thrown out by the security guys for smoking inside (not allowed in Sweden since like the end of WW2 or something).
After trying to keep our poker faces for a few songs we decided to end the "show" and went off stage. But the door to the backstage area had got locked by itself. So we had to stay on the stage and keep showering ourselves in the pride of a good gig. Good for the sound guy he wasn't present any more."