Onslaught - Paranoid Open Air Festival - Celje, Slovenia  13-15th August 2009

Onslaught have played Slovenia once before at the Metal Camp Festival in Tolmin and it was fantastic, so I'm really looking forward to this one. Paranoid Open Air is a much smaller affair set in Celje, which is again a beautiful setting - ain't many shows where you can look out over the Alps when you're on stage!

We get there the day before we are due to play, book into our hotel, which is delightful, and head over to the festival grounds. Blaze Belly, sorry Bayley, is playing this evening and a long time friend and one time Onslaught guitar tech, Jay, is playing guitar in his current line up.....gonna be good to catch up.

The sun is shining and there's the smell of burgers, beer and heavy metal in the air.................ahhhhhhh, life is good !  ha-ha! Never had hot sauerkraut before - the backstage menu is a little....errr .......... localised but splendid never the less. I'm laying off the booze today as I want to be fresh for the show tomorrow. Someone offers me a 'homemade' drink that's strangely green - I politely decline but Nige duly obliges .....oooops, big mistake - we'll come back to that later ..........

Myself and Andy take a wonder around the site, cool shirt stands, say hi to a few people
and watch the majority of the bands from near the sound desk. Time to head backstage, say hi to Jay, gather the troops and ship out back to the hotel ...............great catching up with Jay it's always fun spending time with him, a proper geezer!

Okay, the strange green liquid that Nige was downing earlier quite merrily turns out to be a homemade potato whiskey laced with absinthe and he is now completely shapeless! We bundle
him in to a car and head off back to the hotel. The driver is pointing out all the interesting landmarks on the way back, floodlit mountain top castles and such like, and this is being accented by Nige's unconscious lolloping head smashing off the side window every time
we take a corner - rock n' roll!!!

Back at the hotel things get a little weird as no one knows how the fuck to get in! Everything is closed, we've got keys but nothing fits any of the doors?! Luckily my years of playing Tomb Raider pay off and I spot a door on a walkway above our heads.......result, now all we have to do is get Mr Rockett over this crazy assault course, through the playground and over the narrow bridge and we're home and dry! I'm alive, I'm well, where am I?

Saturday! Festival day, and another bright and sunny one it is too! Have breakfast with
German thrashers Necronomicon, then hang around in the (attic) room for most of the afternoon before heading off to the site.

We go on after Agnostic Front, who were fucking amazing! It's getting dark and the
lights are taking full effect. A few onstage sound problems but in general a good show, fucking great crowd! And thanks to the guys in Necronomicon who kindly offered to tech for us during the show! Cheers guys, fucking legends.

Have a wonder around the festival grounds, grab a beer and a kebab, chat to a few folks, admire how so many people have got so far, far beyond drunk it's a joy to watch - almost like a ballet! - and watch Taake. Hang out the folks from Agnostic, great guys, and chat to the singer of Taake who is still fully corpsed up and looks magnificent! If only real life were as much fun!

Back to the hotel, sleep, eat, airport, home. Next stop, Rock Area Loreley .................