Lethal Saint – ‘Lethal Saint’ (Pitch Black Records) Print E-mail
CD Reviews
Written by Darrel Sutton   
Tuesday, 11 May 2010 00:42

Lethal_SaintMy God, if France thought it was the world’s premium producer of cheese, then think again. Cyprus has taken the crown by being home to the world’s number one purveyors of cheese, Lethal Saint.

 

Stepping straight out of 1983, Lethal Saint waste no time (though you’ll beg to differ after listening to this) in ripping, sorry, make that ‘ham-fistedly stumbling’, into the quite cringe worthy ‘Chains Of The Devil’. Cheesier than a tramp's foreskin, it sets a standard so impressively low you wonder where this album will lead. However, fear not, as the Saint manage to maintain this standard with remarkable ease (or should that be cheese) through classics like ‘Thunder Strikes’, ‘Evil Inside’ and the ripe gorgonzola that is ‘Heavy Metal Knights’. Fuck me, even the mighty Thor would struggle to get close to these boys, such is their devotion to the fromage.

 

I know this criticism may come across as somewhat unfair and scathing but this album really is a pile of bollocks. Don’t get me wrong there are some good bits, the guitar solos actually being pretty good, but if you want to hear third rate 80’s trad metal played by the 20th best Marshal Law tribute band in Cyprus, then go knock yourself out. You could even get the album cover airbrushed onto the back of your cut-off Wrangler, if you can find a three year old who can use an airbrush, as the cover looks like it was done for a pre-school assignment. I can almost hear the lawyers of Helloween, Thor, Accept, Y&T and countless others flexing their legal muscles for taking said bands' influence and turning them into utter shite.

 

Really, I can’t recommend this album any less. It's frankly…well…crap.

 

www.myspace.com/lethalsaintmetal